Trouble being in love or staying in loving relationships

I see a lot of people talk about favorite people and falling in love quickly but I do the opposite I can’t seem to fall in love or allow myself to. I constantly start relationships with people and then I try to find a way out or I get completely detached even though nothing happens or I create deadlines for relationships so I don’t feel overwhelmed because I’m so scared of being abandoned. I just leave first and I usually start off liking them a lot but I can never stay for too long. I hate it ruins everything and I always end up alone. Does this happen to anyone else with bpd and how did you fix it🥹