What to do when opponent plays super defensive top lane?

I've recently started to OTP Irelia, and I love her.

It's got to the point where 80% of games I'm winning the laning phase without any problems, however I'm having difficulties once the opponent starts playing uber defensive after I get 2-3 kills

Here's what I do currently:

  1. Try and allow their wave to push, however it inevitably pushes them under their tower. I only hard push if the opponent leaves lane

  2. Once the wave is under their tower I back off and typically look at 1 of 3 options, (1) back to base for the shop, (2) Any nearby objectives in Jungle like Herald (3) Is mid lane over extended and can be ganked?

The problem I'm having is that because players are so defensive, the wave is ALWAYS in their side of the lane (unless I leave lane), so my jungler can't gank, and I'm more prone to ganks. If I leave lane to look for objectives/kills, then I start to fall behind in CS, it also lets the opponent catch up in CS and get more powerful.

It's not often that there are objectives/ganks available, so the game turns into a borefest of me just pushing him under tower and then waiting in safety for the next wave, over and over again

Any tips?