possible po ba na may bpd ako

I don't wanna do self diagnosis pero the past few days, i tried researching why do i feel/act in a certain way and lumabas yung bpd and its symptoms. Nakaka relate ako sa symptoms nya and everything made sense to me. pero skeptic pa rin ako kasi feel ko di naman lahat symptoms meron ako like yung anger issues. Naka indicate kasi ron pag may bpd ka, intense ka makaramdam ng emotions like anger. pero hindi naman ako ganon ka intense magalit or maybe the way I express it lang. instead of raging out pag galit, naiiyak ako or I let it out by doing SH. Pero nakakarelate ako sa symptoms na pagiging avoidant, self sabotage ng relationship, and yung sudden change of mood/splitting. Sobrang lala rin ng pagkababa ng self esteem ko at mainly ito yung reason bakit lagi akong avoidant. I'm in a relationship with my boyfriend for 6 months now, and I always have that urge to break up with him kase pakiramdam ko hindi ako worthy and may mas deserving pa na para sakanya. I badly want to know what the hell is happening with me kasi ang confusing na and I feel like a worse person. Nagsulat ako ng break up message, sinulat ko sya nung 3 months palang kame and nung nagstart lumala yung urge. pero hanggang ngayon di ko sya sinesend kasi I would feel better. pero paulit ulit lang po ang cycle once na natrigger ako mostly out of simplest things, babalik nanaman yung urge makipag break up. Ang situation ko, irerevise ko sya nang ilang ulit pag natritrigger ako tas mag seset ako ng date kailan ko sya isesend pero pag dumating na yung araw na yon, I would feel better and feeling ko ang dramatic ko lang tas ang stupid ng reason kaya ang ending di ko na sya isesend. I would get clingy minsan sakanya tas the day after that, feeling ko nanaman he deserves so much better then I'd get distant. parang baliw ampota di ko na rin alam naiiyak na ako bat ba ako ganto. I badly want to get better pero di pa kasi ganon ka financially stable kaya tiis tiis nalang muna and hanggang dito ko nalang nadidisclose to. gusto kong malaman para at least magkaroon ng self awareness para macontrol ko kahit papaano pagiging impulsive ko sa bagay bagay.