I hate this time of year.

You would think that having over a month off from uni would be great, but no. I have no routine. I don’t know what to do with my time. It was okay around Christmas because it was a Christmas routine for a few days, but I got socially so overwhelmed.

Luckily then it was the Christmas-New Year limbo period, where it’s acceptable to stay in your pyjamas, not leave the house and play video games all day. But that’s over now. Now I have to do things to feel worthwhile.

I feel like I’m floating, like I’m some alien observing everything that I’m doing. I feel depressed and like I’m lazy and not worth anything. At least during term time I feel like I have a structure and a routine to stick to, but during the breaks I have nothing holding me accountable for what I do. I have nowhere to be and nothing to do at a certain time.

I hate this feeling and I hate this time of year.