When her work is affecting the relationship, what to do?
I am married and I need to have a conversation with serious married men who are married to women who's work either requires them to travel alot or work extra hours so they come home late or sometimes work overnight.
My marriage has been okay for the past 3 years with my wife working a morning shift ending in the afternoon but since last month, she is now having an evening shift that is sometimes getting her home around 8pm and sometimes 9pm. She says that moving forward, she might be having night shifts or be sent for work in other counties for some days. She's an engineer in a media company.
I am having a hard time adjusting to the new plan especially because I reckon that it's going to be our new way of life and I need men dealing with the same to help me with their coping mechanism.I am a businessman so my time is not always defined and I too sometime get home late and sometime early.
The prior setup was okay with me because I knew there was someone at home if I got home late, since we have a kid turning 2 years. My wife says that she needs to grow in her career so I understand why her job is important to her.I want to know the following from the Married Men who are very intentional in their marriage.
- How do you cope with a serious change like this that you know is for a lifetime? I.e It's her career so it's not going to change anytime soon
- When she has to leave, say for a week, what is the arrangement on taking care of the kids keeping in mind that I am a business person so I too might not always be home early?
- How do you balance this work dynamics especially if you are providing fully so no one is lacking but she insists that she has to grow her career as well?
- How do you keep yourself from developing resentment towards your wife slowly as the change takes a toll on you?