Can you build the worst RBNY team ever?

In LA, post final, a bunch of ESC members were sitting around a fire pit discussing the merits of past and current players and I kicked forward what turned into a fun chat, so now it's your turn!

What is the worst RBNY team you could build from past and present players?

Rules:
* The goal is to field a team that is capable of winning the wooden spoon.
* The player cannot be played out of position.
* The player must have a reasonable number of games played. Starters preferred.
* You have the entire history of the club's first team to play with.
* There is no cap on salary.

Go.