I hate myself so much

I think I've killed my African egg eating snake named Serpentine (aka Pissy). On wednesday I lifted up her hide in order to clean the terrarium, she jumped at me and I got startled. I accidentally drop the hide on her lower half. I didn't think much of It at first because she acted fairly normal after that. The next day in the morning before going to work I looked into the terrarium as I do every morning, she was in her hidy-hole. When I came back from work I found her unresponsive with her mouth open. Every single snake veterinarian in my city was either on paid leave or would be back at work only on Monday. I've only got her last year in the middle of December and now I just went to burry her I hate myself so much.