Spouse who has been cheating was served today. I am heartbroken

My husband was served divorce papers today.

I am so sad and feel like the biggest POS in the world. EVEN though he's been cheating on me for years and has a gf he's brought around our friends and spends the night with her multiple nights a week. He has cheated on me at least 5x since we've been married. Has been on dating apps, 1st one was a married woman with kids and he brought her around everywhere: the gym, went to her house all the time. 2nd one is a girl he met and has been dating for almost a year. He sees her almost everyday, calls her his gf, brings her around our mutual friends, talks about her, spends the night at her house.

I cried, was sad, tried to express my feelings to him and he never cared, never stopped seeing her, never tried to work on things. He just stopped trying for me. He didn't care and blatantly told me that he will not be loyal AND he wants to be with me and stay married. That he wants to be with me forever...but also wants to sleep around.

He came by the house yesterday to get some stuff. I didn't know he was going to be served today. Yesterday he was really depressed and sad. He said he didn't want to lose me and wants both. Wants this girl and me, wants to be married and with me. That he is so sad and doesn't feel good. That he is depressed and feels hopeless and that something is wrong with him. Idk

Anyway I filed for divorce and been on the fence of him getting served. He did today. I am sad I feel like a terrible person. I worry about him, I worry about his mental health, I worry I am making a mistake... but I don't feel I had a choice.